The Mirror never lies!!!!

If you are a Baby Boomer and can look in the mirror and say "I look so good I almost scare myself," well you seriously need to burn the marijuana patch before you get an all expense paid vacation to the Kingston Pen. courtesy of the Government ? That is the only thing you will ever get for free from our Government and they truly don't give a dam if they cart you off at 80 so heads up.

The reality of age is that we are all white knuckling it and hoping that nature will be kind, and I'm on my knees to her. Personally I am kind of pissed off at the lack of good research in my day. When I was a teenager they gave me that crap, as they were all puffing away -- quit all that smoking -- you will die. When you have barely given up breast feeding what does dying mean to a tween???????

If they had said easy on the smoking, drinking, and sun tanning you will look old as your Grandmother, a few more beer cans and butts might have been heaved out of the back window of the Impala at the Mustang Drive in. There would have been far less towels ruined with all that baby oil. We obviously all liked third degree burns and how about those peeling contests? Kind of makes you cringe today.

Personally until 58 and 1/2, I never thought much about wrinkles. I used to hear Katherine Hepburn say she really liked turtle necks, well that one finally hit home and so the closet is stacked.

When I think back, to when I was young, I saw many a wrinkled face -- who didn't have a 50 year old grandmother that looked like 70. No really, Grandma really was fifty (although looked like she had been run over by a reindeer). Look closely at the photo, because she wasn't a sun worshipper -- it was the old lady outfit, the non dyed hair, and orthopedic shoes that made her look like a fossil. The face was permanent press, almost wrinkle free. She may have had a scowl on her puss like Kate Gosslin looking at a picture of her old man and his new girlfriend frolicking in the Bahamas , but the skin was pretty good. Noxzema was religiously applied nightly like polyfilla so without the 3 Bs -- Butts, Booze and Beams, skin was as smooth as the baby's bum.

So what do I do now? Well I can ask for Botox certificates from all the kids for Xmas, or you say, forget that, how's my spirit? Personally I would much rather hang around with a wrinkled face, overweight gal with a young spirit that shines so bright it almost blinds me. That is my pick -- BEING young spirited. I couldn't care less if you are wearing pampers as long as you are dancing the twist with me. If you possess the spirit of a teenager that never grew up and are willing to run as fast as your orthopedic knees will allow you, we are in business.

Its so funny to think about a number because truly I can recall like it was yesterday my friends and I being 18 -- I know we were 18 because we were in the last year of high school and parents kept reminding us "wait until you are 18, done high school and out on your own, then you will have a laugh on the other side of your face." Yep that was the threat followed by the old man (probably 50) who zorroed the car brush and whacked you for being a smart mouth. The days before CAS took the weapons away from the parents and you understood the consequences of being a smart mouth even at 18.

But as I recall my glory days, which I doubt I have left, I realized I had friends who had an age of 18 (it was on their driver's licence -- I checked ) sadly had the spirit of an 80 year old. You had to beg them to put down the books for an hour and go cruising to the A & W. God forbid if you drove off with the tray on the roof, they went home and told their mother right away. They had to finish the six pack of Lonesome Charlie before they could release the spontaneous -- would crack a smile, let loose and cut some dance moves.

So Age, depending on the Botox Budget, I may get to look like 40,50,60,at any given time. But the spirit has an age and its forever young. Now is the time when you can shout "who cares." I was once standing around a mall, and this lady came up and said "love your hair." The little grand daughter said "Grandma, do you know that lady? " Grand ma said "no, I'm old now and I can do and say what I want."

So don't worry so much about who you see staring back at you in the mirror -- it will scare the crap out of you. Looks like your mother eh, or worse Grandma? But if you want to make it all disappear, haul yourself up real close to the mirror, stick out your tongue, cross your eyes, or better yet, slap your backside, and wiggle around the room like Beyonce singing All the Single Gals !!! Now there's the joy of your teens resurfaced and the mirror never lies!!!!